1. |
The You Computer
05:54
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I have stopped seeing a person
Your face is an interface
Upgraded to beta version
Buggy put me in a craze
My clicks are asking questions
At this god damn invention
Built by fascist corporation
That allows no fucking mentions
I couldn’t save you
Turned to a device
Programmed not to choose
Forever locked in a vice
Why torture me with a failure
Already broken like shit
I’m done with feeling scared
Release me I hate this wreck
Please strip bare your code
Even though I’m no spy
Your blood is not yet cold
And crack it I’ll try
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2. |
Stay Cleo
06:22
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You can always break from
Grinding cycles of work
You can slack a little
Pay your life that’s mental
You can’t jump like photons
Endless bursts of legwork
Don’t apply those physics
To your wounded joystick
Come to me, come to me, come to me
Hear me out
Change your plans, change your plans, change your plans
Through the clout
There’s no Hades, there’s no Hades, there’s no Hades
For you now
No deity, no deity, no deity
You must bow
Take a swim in yonder
Drift in hazy of green
Bio trips you wander
Lick your serotonin
We all fight our hormones
Battles lost and won back
Know that there’s no headstone
Exit bleakness with hacks
I want you, I want you, I want you
I do Cleo
There’s no point, there’s no point, there’s no point
When you’re not there
Letting go, letting go, letting go
Can’t crush you now
Please stay for, please stay for, please stay for
The good you wear
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3. |
Hidden Camera
03:50
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You pick the date, on cue I come
Hidden camera, nothing crazy
From a distance, nothing loathsome
I diminish gingerly
I stare at you, through the lenses
Authorizing your last breath
I am scared, guilt has hatched
My soul fragments grind to death
My conscience make me suffer
I can’t make out whose life worth more
Benefactor weighs and smothers
Dominates me rots my core
I look at your asphyxiation
Waiting for your will to sprout
Just some pennies mild elations
Screaming shadows loud they shout
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4. |
Lullaby For Her
04:10
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落入土裡 活該是我
你教下代 我卻酒醉
我點煙絲 消費憐憫
無用卻留下 珍貴卻耍走
la la la la la la
我獻出 lullaby
或許或許 我鮮血走
這樣這樣 你會停下
構思惡念 或做聖人
讓你留下 我可變瘋子
la la la la la la
閉上眼 sweet dreams
無助的唱 請愛自己
歌聲卻碰著 一幅磚牆
無助的叫 放下藥樽
聲波卻碰著 穿了的耳朵
do do do do do do
緊抱你 贈安枕
也許也 也許也
一片片 輕快感
Translation:
It should have been me buried in the dirt
You were the teacher, I am just the drunkard
I light my cigs, exploiting others’ sympathy
The useless one stayed, the precious one leaves
La la la la la la
I contribute this lullaby
Maybe, and maybe, my blood drains
So that, so that, you will stay
Crazy thoughts in my head may make me a saviour
I rather be the madman so you’ll stay
La la la la la la
Close your eyes, sweet dreams
I sing hopelessly, please love yourself
But my song just hit a brick wall
I shout desperately, put down the pills
The soundwaves just hit, a shutdown ear
Do do do do do do
Holding you tight, softly resting you
Maybe, and maybe
There’ll be, there’ll be, a slight exhilaration
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5. |
Slasher Gorgeous
04:12
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When, did I lose my feelings
For you, I search empty ceilings
And I, I’m just vaguely grieving
Well then, here’s a fucking play toy
I watch my reflection
I don’t see any soul
Relief, now I can see
Accept, I’m no angel
Mirror mirror on the wall
Who’s the slasher gorgeous
Prowling at night for the sad ones
Gouging away misery
Why, did I care so much now
It’s so, immaterial such facts
And I, I will never show love
It’s true, my tears are fake like stone
I watch my reflection
I don’t see any soul
That’s it, I’ve shed my skin
Evil, that’s what I’ve got
You were no fool stayed away
You were right to go alone
I won’t help your suffering
I crossed my arms watched in glee
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6. |
Stand In The Storm
06:02
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I took a stand in the storm
I know not when to give in
I’m out of strength to stand up
Waves crashing bullying me
Why am I
Staying
Don’t I know I am
Drowning
I hold my hands, to the sky
To pray, to no one
I bow my head, masquerade
At peace, there is none
I see nothing to keep hope
No faith, broken spirit
I turn to dust in the waves
Dissolve, then to zero
Eye of the storm despise me
Imploring me to go down
I shudder losing foothold
And let the waves take me in
I’m falling apart
Painfully
Why I ask
No one hears
No one hears
No one knows
No God cares
That is home
Where I belong
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7. |
Black Joyride
05:16
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Take me take me take me in
This, black joyride
I won’t I won’t question you
Now, I drove too far
Just another sixty-six
Miles, a flaming crater
That beckons me, that beckons me
And it’s time to let go of the wheel
Come take over, come take over please
I’m not struggling, I’m not struggling, look
I threw my fight, I threw my fight, for long
Don’t you see, can’t you see
I am I am full of fuel
To, purgatory
It’s my it’s my it’s my choice
To, go with a bang
I have overachieved this life
True, I want to go now
I see no hope, I see no hope
Sometimes I scream
But it's drowned by noise
I want to leave
But there is no door
I drink my blood
And I cry
And I cry
Then I cry
Until I ate my organs
I am I am killing me
A, joke to the world
I have I have my sharp blade
Well, don’t hesitate
I know I have lived through life
I’m, not entertained
I’m shrugging now, I’m shrugging now
And it’s time for my own funeral
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8. |
Sorry I Forget
04:40
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一天餐室如期約會相聚
肅靜雙望只會憂心一遍
急急吞下無味冷漠餐食
對望按捺心中窩心的愛
找不到字 腦筋廢掉
這般殘酷 沒法能自在
未能關顧 你身子好嗎
只急著說 祝一切順意
只顧行動 卻忘掉慢活
空空臂彎 再服侍背影
最可悲是 忘掉你
歲月過後未曾珍惜
盼有機會 無異義
笑著表達心裡歉意
你可知道我能繼續生活
因為你在沉默站在我旁
每天掙扎從未決定輕生
珍重生命一切似是非是
做不到事 沒有成就
這般殘酷 沒法能化碟
最可惜是 沒有字
讓人道愛卻感隨便
然後開口 卻已太遲
灰黑一生卻沒擁過
Translation:
Meetup at the restaurant as scheduled
Gazing at each other silently with worries
Then gulping our mundane meals
We suppress the warm love in our hearts
No words arise, my brain froze up
Such torturous fact, I can’t find comfort
Just slipped my mind, didn’t ask are you well
Rushing a formality, wish all’s well with you
We just act with practicality, forgetting to chill and enjoy
Our empty arms, serving the shadows again
The saddest truth, I forgot you
Time flew by without me treasuring you
I hope I can, without doubts
Sincerely apologize with a smile
You know you kept my life going
Simply by just being there beside me
I struggle daily but I haven’t offed myself
Preserving life but it felt moot
I couldn’t be productive, achieved nothing
The torturous fact, I can’t rise up
The saddest truth, there’s no words
To express love but just casually
When I opened my mouth, it’s too late
Spending life in the dark, but never embraced
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9. |
Hidden Funeral Delusion
05:00
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Misty Penguin Hong Kong
Misty Penguin started life when transwoman Beatrice starting DJing at Eaton HK and 宀 Club, she contributed a mix to Fabric's feature on Asian Clubs, and her ambient installment for 宀's mix series was a Mix of the Day at RA. She recently focused on music production to express intimate themes of mid-life suicidal impulses and regrets. A collection of final birdsongs from this Misty Penguin. ... more
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